My Marriage Wasnt Working Out Says Arjun Rampal Psychologist On What Happens To Love After A Marriage Breaks Up

On a recent podcast, actor Arjun Rampal candidly reflected on the breakdown of his marriage, saying, “My marriage wasn’t working out, I was losing everything.” When psychologist Sohini Rohra asked him, “What happens to love after a marriage breaks?”, Rampal responded with striking honesty: “We are constantly changing, sometimes in that change one doesn’t grow or change. I was very lucky again. I got Gabriella into my life, it’s not gonna be the same obviously. When you lose everything, there’s only one thing that’s left in front of you, and that’s pure introspection. You have to go back within yourself and understand what had you become. You can’t blame. It’s all got to do with you.”

His words resonate with what mental health experts often observe in long-term relationships, people evolve over time, but not always together. According to Arpita Kohli, Psychologist & Counsellor, PSRI Hospital, emotional disconnect rarely happens overnight. Instead, it develops gradually through emotional distance, lack of communication, and unmet emotional needs.

DISCLAIMER: This article is based on information from the public domain and/or the experts we spoke to.

“One of the earliest signs of emotional disconnect is when conversations become purely functional,” says Kohli. “Couples may only discuss bills, responsibilities, or routines, while emotional sharing slowly disappears.”

She says partners may stop discussing their fears, aspirations, or personal struggles with each other. Over time, this emotional withdrawal creates loneliness even within the relationship.

“Another important sign is when couples stop trying to understand each other’s changing emotional needs,” Kohli says. “When unresolved misunderstandings continue for a long time, partners can begin to feel more like roommates than emotional companions.”

Rampal’s emphasis on introspection rather than blame also reflects an important part of emotional healing, experts say. “Self-reflection after a breakup is extremely important because it allows individuals to understand their own emotional patterns and communication gaps,” says Kohli. “Instead of remaining stuck in anger, blame, or resentment, introspection creates space for acceptance and growth.”

According to her, breakups and divorces often force individuals to confront parts of themselves they may have ignored during the relationship.

“Healing becomes healthier when a person is honest about both their emotional pain and their personal role in the relationship dynamic,” Kohli explains. “This awareness can help people avoid repeating unhealthy patterns in future relationships.”

Kohli says love can evolve into a healthier form after divorce or separation. “Difficult experiences often increase emotional maturity and self-awareness. With emotional maturity, relationships become less about dependency and more about mutual respect and emotional safety,” she says.

“People tend to enter future relationships with more realistic expectations and greater emotional balance.” Rampal’s own reflection on finding love again after loss highlights this emotional transformation. While he acknowledged that love may never feel “the same,” his words also point toward a deeper understanding of relationships — one shaped not just by romance, but by self-awareness and growth.

“As individuals heal and understand themselves better, they often become capable of building stronger and more balanced emotional connections,” Kohli emphasises.