You may think of your childhood as a distant part of your life, but some of the thoughts you learned early can stay with you as an adult. You may blame yourself when something goes wrong, expect bad news or assume that a difficult situation will get worse. These reactions can feel automatic, but they can also give you a chance to understand yourself more deeply.
Her approach offers a simple way to turn inner-child work into a practice of self-awareness.
Tsafrir uses the word BLUE to describe four ways your mind can respond when you feel vulnerable.
Tsafrir says these patterns can serve a purpose. “We blame ourselves to feel in control and less helpless,” she wrote. She added that the other three patterns can represent your brain trying to keep you safe, even when it overreacts.
You can start by noticing your thoughts instead of judging them. When you catch yourself expecting the worst, pause and ask what you actually know about the situation.
You can also ask yourself, “Am I feeling BLUE?” The question can help you notice whether you have started blaming yourself, searching for negative signs, guessing an unhappy outcome or exaggerating a problem.
Tsafrir suggests that this awareness can help you respond to your adult self and your inner child with greater compassion.
You do not need a complicated ritual. You can sit quietly, write down your thoughts or speak to yourself with the same patience you would offer a child who feels frightened or confused.
Inner-child work can fit into a spiritual practice when you use it to understand your emotions, develop self-awareness and reconnect with parts of yourself that you may have ignored.
Journaling can give you a private space to explore old reactions. Meditation can help you notice thoughts without immediately acting on them. Quiet reflection can help you understand why certain situations trigger strong emotions.
Tsafrir explores these ideas through her work in what she calls “Sacred Psychiatry.” She connects psychological patterns with a deeper process of self-understanding and compassion.
Her message does not ask you to fight difficult thoughts. Instead, you can learn to notice them and respond with greater kindness.
The next time you feel overwhelmed, pause before you react. Ask yourself whether you are blaming yourself for something outside your control.
You can write down what happened, what you feel and what you actually know. This simple practice can create some distance between you and your thoughts.
Inner-child work does not require you to relive every childhood experience. You can use it as a gentle practice of awareness. When you recognise an old pattern, you give yourself an opportunity to choose a different response.
As Tsafrir puts it, understanding these patterns can help you bring “more compassion to both our adult selves and our inner children.”
Soumi Pyne is a Senior Content Producer at Hindustan Times with four years of work experience. She started her career as a digital journalist with HT after completing her master's in media and communication from NSHM Kolkata. She covers topics in astrology, manifesting, and tarot readings, and also interviews astrologers to share their stories. In 2022, she interviewed the young indigo pilot who had saved Indian students from Ukraine. She has also covered stories about the Dhoomimal Art Gallery and a few lifestyle stories. She is now a fervent reader of astrology, but before working full-time on the Astrology beat, she coordinated and published think tank stories in the HT insight section. Additionally, produced Live Mint and HT newsletters, during which she had the scope to publish news articles by HT's editor-in-chief, Sukumar Ranganathan. She puts in her best effort to make her readers justify the statement "Astrology is a pseudoscience". While she believes that Astrology is not intertwined with Science, she aims to help her readers understand that the human body can be influenced by planetary alignments, drawing on insights from Indian and USA astrologers. Outside her professional sphere, she enjoys a healthy lifestyle through yoga, journaling, meditation, running, and cooking gluten-free meals. She is an avid documentary enthusiast who loves watching BBC, Discovery, and other channels, with a focus on ancient history, space, art, and culture. Also, you'll often find her taking her pooch to new cafes and often taking short trips with her girls or her family to offbeat places.Read More