Why Are Some People Quick To Yell Therapist Jeffrey Meltzer Explains And Highlights Why It Should Not Be Excused

. Yet, some people resort to yelling very often to get their point across in many different settings.

According to Jeffrey, a likely cause of some people being quick to yell is that they have learned that raising their voice is the only way to be taken seriously.

“Maybe in the past, they tried asking calmly. They tried explaining what they needed, but the other person dismissed them or continued doing the same exact thing. Then they raised their voice, and suddenly the other person listened,” explained the therapist.

“Their brain began making a connection: ‘People do not hear me unless I get loud.’ After enough experiences like that, they may stop trying to communicate calmly altogether. Why waste time speaking gently when they expect to be ignored? So, they go straight into yelling.”

Jeffrey pointed out that from the outside, the people who yell often appear to be the reactive ones. They may appear aggressive, dramatic, or emotionally immature. But underneath that reaction may be someone who feels powerless and desperately wants to be understood.

Jeffrey clearly stated that no matter what the cause of the behaviour is, it does not mean that yelling often is healthy. Understanding where a behaviour comes from does not mean excusing it.

“Someone's past may explain why they communicate this way, but they are still responsible for learning how to express their needs without intimidating or hurting the people around them. And the person being yelled at does not have to tolerate disrespect in order to be compassionate,” shared the therapist.

“You can recognise that someone feels unheard while still calmly saying, ‘I want to understand what you're saying. I'm listening, but I need you to speak to me without yelling’. That response communicates something they may not have experienced before: they can be heard without having to become louder,” he observed.

Over time, healthy relationships can teach people that calm communication does not always lead to dismissal. But they also have to be willing to unlearn the belief that yelling is the only way their feelings will matter, pointed out Jeffrey.

Note to readers: This article is for informational purposes only and not a substitute for professional medical advice. This report is based on user-generated content from social media. HT.com has not independently verified the claims and does not endorse them.

Jeffrey Meltzer is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor based in Florida. He graduated with a Master's in Mental Health Counselling from the University of South Florida and has been providing therapy services for over seven years.

Debapriya Bhattacharya is a Content Producer at Hindustan Times. He started his career in 2022, working in newsrooms in beats like education, US news, trending stories, and entertainment. In his new role in the lifestyle desk, he seeks to deliver a balanced blend of research-driven reporting and creative storytelling from health and recipes to art and culture. Science, philosophy, food and pop culture are what pump his veins and help bring heart to his stories. Debapriya tries to see out subjects that will allow him and readers to explore new frontiers and improve the quality of life for all. The explorations can be both external and internal, as thoughts seek to be as chaotic as the greater universe. As a citizen of the world, Debapriya has been fascinated by the lives of people across the globe throughout time. His curiosity leads him to explore new linguistic and cultural landscapes to broaden his horizons and deepen his understanding of global narratives. Beyond the newsroom, Debapriya loves to participate in debate and theatre, spaces that he considers to be holy grounds for nuance and self-expression. A graduate from Ashutosh College, University of Calcutta, Debapriya completed his Master's degree from the same university in 2022. An ambiverted bibliophile, he loves his solitude as much as he adores stimulating conversations. And despite his reverence for tech, libraries continue to be his favourite place for research.Read More