Sunanda Sharma Depression Relationship Love Marriage Mental Health

Punjabi singer-actor Sunanda Sharma recently opened up about one of the darkest phases of her life, revealing that she spent over two months confined to a dark room while battling depression. In a podcast with Shubhankar Mishra, she also reflected on how the experience reshaped her views on love, marriage, financial independence, and relationships.

Recalling her struggle with depression, Sunanda said she isolated herself for “2 months and 17 days” in complete darkness, barely interacting with anyone, including her family.

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“I went to a few psychiatrists, but it is not my cup of tea. I couldn’t understand how they could understand my pain and how they could ease it. I was confined to my room for 2 months and 17 days in complete darkness. If I were hungry, I would knock and ask for food from my mother,” she said.

“But when she came to me asking if I would want to eat, it would end in an altercation: why did you open my door? I was confined to a corner. That was a dark phase,” Sunanda added.

The Sajjan Singh Rangroot actor shared that although she has moved forward, she still feels that a part of her depression lingers. “I was lonely and was scared. My reality was starting to eat me up. I also started to feel things like, where do I need to go? What do I need to do,” she said.

Describing how the experience continues to affect her relationships, the singer admitted that expressions of love still make her anxious.

“I stopped talking to people. I think some part of depression is still left in me. Because I get scared when someone shows me love. I start crying. I started giving materialistic things so that people wouldn’t leave me. I started believing that people can only stay with you for money. I started buying people with money,” she said.

Dr Rimpa Sarkar, mental health expert, PhD, Sentier Wellness, Mumbai, said such experiences can leave lasting emotional scars even after the most severe symptoms of depression improve.

She explained that prolonged social withdrawal, emotional isolation, loss of interest in daily life, persistent sadness, and feelings of hopelessness are among the warning signs of severe depression. She added that emotional trauma can make people associate intimacy with pain, making it difficult to trust others or receive affection long after the acute phase has passed.

Further, Sunanda revealed that her eight-year relationship significantly influenced her opinion on marriage. While she said she still believes in love, she no longer feels ready to commit to marriage.

“It’s not that I don’t believe in marriage. I still love love and I love being in love. I feel so good if someone loves me but at this point, I don’t want this. Maybe there will be a change in me again, some things may take a new turn so that I can again open up and say that I want to love. But right now my focus is on my music, my work, my money,” she said.

The singer said she values the few meaningful relationships she has built over romantic companionship.

“I have that someone in my life but it doesn’t need to be a love affair. Even today I say that it is difficult to earn a person. But I have earned those three-four people in my life,” she said.

Speaking about loyalty in relationships, Sunanda expressed scepticism about lifelong commitment, saying she has seen too many relationships fall apart. “The truth is we do not choose someone for life. You get attracted to someone for some time, you feel loved, then people start searching for someone else. I don’t want that. If that doesn’t happen till then I am not ready,” she said.

She added, “The world is an example of this. I know so many people who come in front of the camera and say they are the best couple but are having affairs. What’s this? I can’t do this. I don’t want to share my partner with anyone. So, I don’t think people are prepared to dedicate their lives to someone else.”

Dr Sarkar noted that fears of abandonment and low self-worth can sometimes lead people to believe they must constantly give, emotionally or materially, to keep others from leaving. She said healthier relationships are built on mutual care, trust, respect and emotional reciprocity rather than constantly proving one’s worth.

Sunanda also credited financial independence with giving her the confidence to walk away from an unhealthy relationship, urging women to prioritise their careers and financial security.

“I want to say this to all the girls out there, focus on yourself, earn your money, be financially independent because money gives you freedom. People ask me why I gave my eight years to a relationship. Because I wasn’t financially independent. I did not have financial freedom. When you have the freedom of money, you get the courage to fight,” she said.

“I am at the point in life where I just want respect and love,” Sunanda stressed.

Dr Sarkar said financial independence often strengthens a person’s sense of autonomy and self-efficacy, making it easier to leave emotionally damaging relationships. “Many people remain in unhealthy or abusive relationships because they fear the practical consequences of leaving. Financial independence can reduce that fear by increasing confidence, decision-making ability, and the belief that one can manage life independently,” she explained.